THE END. Or is it? Two sequels later and yes, it really is. But there’s still life in this franchise yet, so let’s show you what happened before. You’re an idiot for thinking you knew the full story. Also, if you think they look older than they do in the future then you’re wrong.
5: Trailer Park Boys: The Movie (2006)
Not many people watch the classic Canadian mockumentary Trailer Park Boys, but not many people have as good a taste as I do. But then again pretty much the whole of Canada watches it, so we’ll leave that one there. The movie is vintage TPB and as good a place to start as any.
4: Red Dragon (2002)
Red Dragon is a prequel to Silence of the Lambs, but it’s also a remake of Manhunter, which was made before Silence of the Lambs. If you’re concerned about where Hannibal and Hannibal Rising fit into this timeline then don’t be – because they’re both shite.
3: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)
Temple of Doom is a rather underrated and pretty scary entry in the series, showing a more selfish and even more misogynous Indy, who seeks “fortune and glory” whilst wholeheartedly endorsing child slave labour.
2: Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (2005)
After the preposterous Phantom Menace and the rather dreary Attack of the Clones, the Star Wars series manned up once more and produced this very dark and well-constructed end to a full trilogy of prequels. That fun-loving young Skywalker is no more as he ventures into true psycho territory and kills loads of kids. “Chosen one” my ass Kenobi, this kid’s a nut job.
1: The Godfather Part II (1974)
Bobby De Niro plays a young Marlon Brando whilst Al Pacino starts turning into his father who incidentally happens to be both Bobby De Niro and Marlon Brando. This definitely classifies as a prequel so shaddapa your face.
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